How to swear in Italian without offending anyone

Learn the most common Italian Swear words that you won’t find in your textbook and how to use them (or not!) when talking to Italians.

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Today's Italian words:
Che due palle! = What a pain in the ass (lit. what 2 balls)
Sei incazzato? = Are you pissed (off)?
Merda! = Shit!
Che cazzo! = What the f*ck!